“Oh Lizzy, do anything rather than marry without affection.” -Jane Austen Pride and Prejudice
A marriage without affection is most women’s worst nightmare.
The days were dark and lonely that I strained to be noticed by a husband who passed me by without a kiss, a touch or even a smile. I longed for him to see me. I wanted nothing else but to know I captivated him. But I didn’t.
My marriage was broken.
Maybe yours is too.
Maybe you are lost in hurt, questions, doubt, fear and loneliness. Maybe you are trapped by silence. You have no one to go to. No one to help you.
I want you to know that today, I’m here. Today, Jesus is here. Today you can take the first step in putting your marriage back together. Today you can begin to take your marriage back from…
Work
Put your lap top down, stop hiding behind loads of laundry, dirty dishes or motherhood. Be available. Let yourself be exposed to your husband. Let yourself be exposed to God.
I know how scary this is. If you dare to put your heart on the line, you might get hurt. It’s too vulnerable, too dangerous, too risky. But dear one, it’s too risky not to.
Kids
Being a mother is eternally important. So is being a wife.
Sometimes the role of motherhood absorbs our identity. It eclipse everything we are or ever were. Before motherhood, you were a wife. You were a woman. There was a time your husband was hot for that woman. Find her again.
Ministry
Serving other people is eternally important. So is your husband.
It is so easy to hide behind the church, preparing for bible class, getting the house ready for your small group or visiting shut-ins. Don’t just make time for your husband in all that, put him before all that.
The Other Woman
She may be on a the pages of a magazine, on a computer screen or in a hotel room. It is time to take your husband back. This isn’t about more sex or acting out his deviant fantasies. This is about praying until your flesh collapses. This is about giving him a soft place to fall. This is about unlocking the demonic grip on his heart. Stop seeing him as a philanderer and start seeing him as a soul.
Her house is the way to Sheol,
Descending to the chambers of death. Prov. 7:27
Brokenness
My marriage was broken because my husband was broken. He was hurting and suffering deep within his heart. I was more like acid on his wounds than balm. Be balm. Be the hands and feet of Jesus ministering to your husband. Create a place of healing for his hurts.
Denial
We were good at this. We wore the mask of ministry, laughter and togetherness for a long time. Take off the mask. Be real about your struggles. The devil thrives in darkness. It is time to turn on the lights.
Take no part in the worthless deeds of evil and darkness; instead, expose them. Eph. 5:11
And tell
Jesus
Do not underestimate the power of the divine healer. Remember he makes the blind see and dead live. He is the same one who said:
The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me,
because the Lord has anointed me
to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners.
There is no problem that he cannot heal. There is no power of darkness that he hasn’t already overcome. Step out of his way and let him be God.
He canceled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to the cross. In this way, he disarmed the spiritual rulers and authorities. He shamed them publicly by his victory over them on the cross. Col. 2: 14-15
Hide yourself in Christ. Invite him to wash your marriage with his blood. And let him doing the fixing.
I am committed to praying for you today. Feel free to post a comment or privately email me at awordywoman@gmail.com
