Dear Husband, I have a secret that I have been keeping for a long time. I have been afraid to tell you. And I don’t really know how to tell you. I am so scared to show my heart. I am so scared to be vulnerable because I have been hurt so many times before when I try. I am lonely. I am lonely in our marriage. I am lonely at church. I am lonely at home. I feel so alone some days I think it could swallow me. Some days it does. I don’t know what to do. I am slowly dying inside. I am drowning in isolation. In my loneliness I feel so far from God, so unworthy and so unlovable. I want to be alive. I want to be the real me. I want you to love the real me.
I want to have conversations with other women like me. I want to have support for the things I am struggling with. I need a spiritual family. I need friends. I need your strength. I need your leadership. I need you. Love, Your Lonely Wife
Maybe this woman is you. Maybe you are lonely. Maybe you are silently hungering for connection and you just don’t know how to tell your husband. Please remember this:
Blame
Don’t blame him. Your husband is struggling with his own insecurities and failures. If he feels like he is failing you too it just might be too much for him to handle.
Belittle
Don’t take those feelings of yours and put him down. Your feelings will bubble out somewhere. Make sure it isn’t in the form of insults to your man.
Burden
To a man, a woman is a vast, gaping emotional barren wasteland. The thought of being responsible to fill you up is enough to make the most courageous of men go running off with their tail between their legs.
Let God be enough. “Do I not fill the heavens and the earth?” declares the Lord (Jer. 23:24). Let the God who fills the heavens and the earth fill you.
Build
Don’t build walls that keep your husband out. Sometimes it feels safer to just stay hunkered down behind the walls around your heart. One by one, start taking those bricks down. Be brave. Be you.
God makes a home for the lonely. Psalm 68:6
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