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When Motherhood Is Kicking My Butt

Motherhood isn’t just kicking my butt. It is wiping my bloodied face on the mat. Really!

I have a tempestuous toddler who has seizures.

I have a 13-year-old who was just diagnosed with the most severe case of scoliosis possible.

I have a 14-year-old navigating the waters of independence, self-awareness and emotion.

I have a 7-year-old who has been hiding homework in her back pack.

I have a 4 year old who is… well she’s four!

I have a nine-year old who is prone to withdraw during chaos and I often find myself neglecting her.

I still grieve a son who isn’t in my arms.

I have another 17-year-old son who is 1 year away from leaving my protection.

The past week it has all just been A LOT!

Then guilt berates me. You know that feeling of “I should be enough to handle all this and when I can’t there must be something wrong with me.”  I shrink from the truth that it is too much. I don’t want to seem ungrateful. I really don’t want them to think they are too much. I do want them to feel loved by their mother every minute of their lives.

Here’s the bigger truth. Loving people selflessly will kick your butt.

When you give yourself completely over to loving like Jesus it will crush you. It will devastate you. It will pierce your side.

So Mama, when you are crushed, devastated and pierced… remember the end of the story.

Yet God raised Jesus to life! God’s Spirit now lives in you, and he will raise you to life by his Spirit. Romans 8:11 CEV

 

Mar 3, 2018Serena
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Comments: 5
  1. Sherry
    4 years ago

    If you or your daughter would like to talk to my daughter who is now 36 and had scoliosis/spinal fusion surgery when she was preteen, email me and I’ll put you in touch.

    ReplyCancel
    • Serena
      4 years ago

      Thank you!

      ReplyCancel
  2. Andra
    4 years ago

    We, as parents, were never meant to be adequate to provide all that our children need. God did that on purpose, so that we can use those opportunities in which this truth is painfully obvious to point our children to Him…the all-sufficient, more-than-adequate Seer and Lover of each and every one of them in each and every one of their special, individualized, needed ways– the perfect father and mother combined into One God Who loves and cares for them more than we ever could.

    It sounds like you are doing just that, Serena. You could not give your children a better love or upbringing than that of pointing them to the Only One who can fulfill their every need and desire. ☺ And thanks for pointing us other mamas to Him, too! God bless you and your family. My heart and prayers are with you and of course, He is, too, and always will be. (HUGS)

    ReplyCancel
  3. Kate
    4 years ago

    Praying for you, Serena. I so get the visual of life wiping your bloodied face on the mat. I only have two; but they are more than enough for this single mama to handle. Thank you for your realness. Thank you for the faith you live for others to witness. Your husband and children are blessed.

    ReplyCancel
  4. totti
    4 years ago

    Thank you so much dear!! Lot of kisses

    ReplyCancel

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Serena
4 years ago 5 Comments Christian Life, Daughters, Motherhood699
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