Daniel’s Mema and the great-grandmother of my children
Well, we are diving back into, Help Wanted: Mother’s Needed. These comments were so good I felt like they needed a little more attention than the comments section afforded.
“The happiest time of my life was during the depression when my mother was at home. I was only nine years old when she went to work. It was during WW11, and women went to work because the men left to fight for our country. When the war was over, the women didn’t want to give up their jobs to stay at home, and didn’t. That was, in my opinion, the downfall of the home. It’s easier to work away from home, have someone else watch your kids, and even hire someone to clean your house… not to mention being able to have many more “things”.
Oddly, the depression years hold some of my best family memories even though we wore hand-me-downs and ate soup beans at about every meal. (my mother could fix them in so many different ways). We wore hand-me-downs and played made up games. We were so happy when someone gave us a Sears & Roebuck catalog to cut up and make paper dolls. .. I’m not saying folks should have to live that way now, but sometimes what we think are necessities, we could easily do without. I know many women who truly do have to work to help support their families. Too many, though, choose to go out and work. I was one who chose to work out of the home and I can look back with regret and see so many precious times and moments that I missed as well as see what my children missed because of my not being there when they needed me.” -Mema age 81“Never was a stay at home mom thought my ‘job’ was the most important. Now I realize that decision was a mistake. I ended up divorced and left the Lord for many years. But our God is so good because despite my bad choices in life, He protected my daughter throughout and my daughter is now a fine christian woman, a dutiful wife and outstanding mother. So every day I thank my Saviour that Serena Kay DeGarmo is my daughter and that she nurtures and loves my grandchildren with such zeal and devotion and has chosen to raise them alongside Daniel in a pure and Godly home. I truly admire my daughter because despite all of the material “treasures” that I gave her when she was growing up, she has taught me what the true treasures in my life are.” – My Mom age 62
First of all, feel free to skip all of my mother’s doting. She is my mom and a little biased.
Second, when I think of passages like “Don’t neglect your mother’s instruction.” I am reminded that older women in our churches and families have a lot to offer. In my youthful, foolishness, I used to disregard older women’s advise if I didn’t deem them “worthy.” Now, I’ll give it to you, age alone doesn’t make a person wise, but experience, self-reflection, and God’s Spirit working in you does. I think these women qualify.
I see these thoughts from two older women as a modern day Ecclesiastes for women. They have “been there and done that” and they want to share with us what the real meaning of life is. Solomon did the same thing. At the end of his life he detailed all his earthly achievements and all the “stuff” he acquired. But at the end he said, “But as I looked at everything I had worked so hard to accomplish, it was all so meaningless- like chasing the wind. There was nothing really worthwhile anywhere” (Ecc.2:11).
If I could sum up Mema and my mom’s words together it would be this, “Stuff doesn’t matter people do.” Relationships matter. Growing strong families for God matters. Being there, actually THERE, for each other matters. Let’s stop chasing the wind and do something with our lives that really matters.
I’m sitting here thinking of something else to say about it. But I think that’s enough commentary for today. I’ll just let their words speak for themselves.
I will leave you with the verses that started all this:
As for you, Titus, promote the kind of living that reflects wholesome teaching... teach the older women to live in a way that honors God. They must not slander others or be heavy drinkers.Instead, they should teach others what is good. These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God (Titus 2:1, 3-5).
