From day one of motherhood grief, I have been drawn to sharing my journey. Just weeks after my son died I knew God planned it that way. I was already scheduled to speak about marriage to group of retreat women. Nothing challenges marriage like the death of a child. I knew I had to go. I had to speak.
Over the past 3 years I have been invited to share many times. But last weekend, as I spoke again, something hit me. I realized why. I have to tell people the truth about who God really is.
When we are wounded by profound loss, we start to believe lies about God. Those lies begin to weave a prison of doubt, bitterness and blame.
We cry out:
- Why me?
- What did I ever do to you God?
- Why did God let this happen?
- If there is a loving God why does he kill babies?
Those question reek of such human ignorance on the nature of the divine.
God is not a killer.
In fact it is completely the opposite. The Lord God of heaven is a life-giver. His essence is life.
Then the Lord God formed the man from the dust of the ground. He breathed the breath of life into the man’s nostrils, and the man became a living person. Gen. 2:7
God never wanted death.
For those of us wrestling with grief and death, the first few chapters of Genesis reveal the source of death. It was never the Creator’s plan for us to die.
It was one of those lies about God that brought on death.
When Adam sinned, sin entered the world. Adam’s sin brought death, so death spread to everyone, for everyone sinned. Rom. 5:12
God does not have a personal vendetta against you.
Your Father doesn’t hate you or want punish you. No, it is quite the opposite. He is in active pursuit for you.
Jesus gave his life for our sins, just as God our Father planned, in order to rescue us from this evil world in which we live. Gal. 1:4
God is eternal.
We may not have all the wrongs made right in this finite world. But on the side of eternity, all things will be redeemed. All of our losses will be restored. All of our pain will be healed. All of our longings will be fulfilled.
And this is the way to have eternal life—to know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, the one you sent to earth. John 17:3